Thursday, January 6, 2011

Rodi the talking horse.

For a while now Equishopping has had a talking horse called Rodi.  He's given you updates on everything from his new stable mates to his best buys for 2010.  However, the time has come for Rodi to gain his voice.  He's been nagging us for ages about writing his memoirs and since the highly successful launch of his very own company Rodi inc  we thought we'd let him have a bash.  Here goes!!

"SO.  These blasted humans have been writing about me for ages! Rodi this and Rodi that, yadee yadee yada etc etc. Well I think it's about time I spoke up a bit! I'll start with an introduction. 

I was born a few years back when the grass was greener and it didn't snow so much.  I grew up like most young foals in a field and in absolute fear of my mother - a fearsome beast! Thankfully I was sold soon after that and headed off over the green hills in a strange contraption with wheels.  I must confess that I found the "lorry" business really rather tricky.  For starters standing upright while going round this large circle of trees in the middle of the road without clinging on with your teeth isn't easy.  When I did try to use my teeth I sunk my little knashers into something nice and fleshy with a good bit of grip -oops!!.  Next thing I know I get a mouthful off this big bruiser next to me who I'd mistakenly bitten... It turns out he's some kind of important geeser in the showjumping world, not that that meant anything to me at the time.  I suppose I got my own back though when I set up "RODI INC."  and gave him the job title "the hefalump".  Personally I think the name hefalump suits him.  In my humble opinion he wasn't chosen for his good looks but insted someone decided to put a saddle on him and see if he would jump.  Tragically he's rather good at it- as he reminds me daily.  

Then we were there! The back of the lorry came down and I stumbled out into the biggest yard I'd ever seen!! There were horses everywhere, all dressed in fancy saddles and bridles and some of them were doing some very strange dancey things in this rubber rectangle with fencing round.  They kind of pushed me into a stable and then left me... cheers guys. 

That was it.  I suppose this is home then.  No, "welcome, welcome, have a carrot and a hug" just a stable, a bit of dirty broken up wood powder stuff on the floor and a couple of hooligan colts for company.  That's when Rodi inc. started but more on that later.  

Now I suppose you're wondering what Rodi inc. is.  Rodi inc. is my personal company, or shall we say, moderately large global business run by a small army of horses and ponies across the globe.  With me, Rodi, at the helm.  We have various branches.  Ranging from international horse trading - you think you decide to buy a horse? I think you'll find that you just happened to find a suitably graded horse within its allocated transfer window with the correct national branch position.  It's not an easy job you know.  Our latest business venture is a more personal one.  These humans decided to use me as a front for their company, and they've been writing about me for rather a while.  It turns out that they're a bit mule ish at it and can't sell much - humans hey!  I decided to get involved personally - for a price of course.  Plus, when my memoirs are published  I'll be able to pay off my debts to the Zangasheide brothers after that night at Olympia.... that's another story though.  

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